feelin' funky

oh dear.

graduation approaches but not fast enough. i'm tired of the fight but won't dare quit now. the "little things" are taking over my list, growing it to a full length page and a half. it's spring break and everyone seems to be in such hap-happy moods. kids are going nuts, running into the library at full speed and leaving me feeling trashed. that's how i feel this week, 

trashed.

but that's what i get from trying to do this alone. Lord, forgive me.      set me free.

until this week there were two of my grandmother's siblings still living. tuesday my aunt juanita passed away from complications caused by pneumonia. from a recent post you know that i have been remembering my grandma a good bit lately with the weather and her favorite time of year in full bloom. this week i feel as if i lost another piece of her, one more person who could help me remember. my family all says that i looked most like my grandma - and grandma looked most like juanita. somehow that brought me closer to her with a stronger kinship than some of the others. 

it seems that the more "greats" you have to add to describe a family relationship often translates as distance. many assume that great-great grandparents are not as close to heart as great-grandparents, and that they are not as close as grandparents. but some families are quite the opposite when we are taught to hold those with more "greats" even closer and more dear because of their seniority. 

i was raised in part by fifteen great aunts and uncles on my dad's side alone. they lived in the same community, shared and farmed the same land they had inherited from their parents, cooked the same great food year after year, and scolded us with the same hearts they loved us with. and just within the past three years their numbers have dwindled leaving now only one set; my grandma's youngest sister and her husband.

how can one feel the excitement of a life just beginning in the same beat as the deep sorrow of losing so much. 

my family dwindles.

my mood fluctuates.

it's a funk i hope to shake soon.

here's a few words from one of my granny's favorites:

"rock of ages cleft for me, let me hide myself in thee"

let me just hide for awhile and i'll be good to go.

Sweet Bunny Tales

This sweet little girl loves to ANNOUNCE! It's her newest thing follow all phrases and sentences up with, "erry-body!" 

And so- this was how our Easter sounded:

"I'm here erry-body!"

"I got my basket erry-body!"

"Say grace erry-body!"

"Let's play erry-body!"

"Dye Easter eggs erry-body!"

HAPPY EASTER ERRY-BODY!

My Tide Pen has failed me....

Excuse the boob shot, but I don't think my followers amount to more than women right now anyway.

The dreaded spot on the clean, BRAND NEW, essential white tee. A purchase, which was made, need I even say it, because of another spot on ANOTHER essential white tee. I could feed a family off the money I spend on essential white tees- and still not have one without a spot!

The Tide pen that is designed to save us from all that embarrassment and unnecessary spending? FAILED. 

The end. Back to Target. 

I thought I loved you then...

I've been loving it when my blogger-friends do flashback posts! No matter what the topic is or how far "back" goes, I just love memories.

This is one of my personal favs.

For our first "real" date (we hung out with friends and family a lot before he actually took me somewhere and paid for it :0)), we took a trip in the old '68 Convertible up at the Waccatee Zoo in Conway, SC. If you have never heard of it, or been for a visit, let me tell you- it is a diamond in the rough! The animals are spunky, yet seemingly out of place. You know they're treated well, but the lion is quite temperamental and tends to spray his guests. One of the monkey's threw peanuts at us. The entire trip was HIGH-larious!

In general, the setting was practically as awkward as we felt; holding hands in public for the first time, just having become "official" the night before... such sweet memories! I'm so glad Christy took and sent me this picture!

A thought.

Gorgeous Spring days like the one we had yesterday trigger such wave of my senses. It seems to bring me out of hibernation and give me some new found hope that I didn't even realize I needed. But we can always use a little hope and it's always a welcomed feeling, even if I was stuck at work all day.

This was my Granny's favorite time of year. She loved Easter and blooming flowers, going to the flower show and touring the neighborhoods to see all the Azaleas in their magnificent colors.

Even though it's been awhile,

   even though her apartment no longer smells like her,

     even though it's not nearly as hard as it was to think of her without crying,

I still miss her so much on days just like this one.

My sweet Brandon suggested that we plant something in memory of her this Spring; perhaps for Mother's Day, he said. What a great idea! 

So I'm looking for Japanese tulip seedlings... she thought those were just wonderful!

rain, rain..... oh, bother

I have about a kamillion things to do at lunch including, but not limited to: returns, errands, eating, and various other tasks made much, much less pleasant in the rain...

How then will I accomplish all these things without the trusty umbrella I apparently do NOT have in my car any longer?

I'm gonna have to get one of those funny plastic bonnet-hats my granny used to wear. You just tie it up under the chin and go on about your business- until you get inside and realize just how ridiculous you look!

Oh, Granny. Wish you were here...

Reverse fx of coffee and... Taking the plunge!

Who here- has experienced these reverse effects of coffee:

........ after your second cup, which is equivalent perhaps to 3 & 1/2 because of how humongously LARGE they are, you actually start yawning!

Have I become immune for the day?!

What's up with that?!

With that said- I've been contemplating the idea of "my" blog for several weeks now. I'll go ahead and put it out there, I was worried my thoughts might not be fun enough for the whole blog world. But after many weeks of standing on the sidelines, I'm taking the plunge!